127. MyMaine Birth: Gloria’s Two Maine Home Births with Loving Care from Sacopee Midwives
Gloria: 0:00
I just growing up, I think, with how I felt with care and the medical system and stuff like that. I wanted to do something, whether it was like a birth center or like a home birth, just something that I could have control over myself, but also like my baby and stuff like that. And I always felt when I went into hospitals or doctor's offices it was like you're on their turf now. So I kind of and I know like birth is something super intimate and really important, how you give birth matters. So I wanted something that I could have control over. So this friend of ours I had kind of floated the idea of a home birth but not being from Maine, I wasn't really sure where to start. And this friend of ours who was over our house was like, oh my goodness, me and my wife did a home birth for both of our daughters and we went with Sakopi midwives and Brenda Sarabian. She delivered both our children and it was like the best experience and I never hear like men talking like that excited about birth and stuff. And so I was just like instantly hooked and was asking him all these questions and he was like I believe she still practices like you should go with them. And so my husband, who was like we're not doing a home birth, was more like, oh, like people do this because a friend that you know, we're good friends of ours and he respects, was saying it was just amazing. So he's like, well, maybe we can meet them and like see how it goes.
Gloria: 1:22
So I called Sakopi Midwives. They had availability. We went in for a consult and I met with Brenda and Acadia and we instantly just fell in love. It was before their office space, so it was at Brenda's home and it's this beautiful farmhouse and overlooking the Sako River, and she has little baby goats in the window. You know it's so homey and she had like muffins ready for us. It was like so sweet and like totally not what my husband was used to with, you know, prenatal care or myself. So we just instantly fell in love and we were like, yep, we're going with them.
Angela: 2:01
I'm Angela and I'm a certified birth photographer, experienced doula, childbirth educator and your host here on the my Maine Birth podcast. This is a space where we share the real-life stories of families and their unique birth experiences in the beautiful state of Maine, from our state's biggest hospitals to birth center births and home births. Every birth story deserves to be heard and celebrated. Whether you're a soon-to-be mom, a seasoned mother or simply interested in the world of birth, these episodes are for you. Welcome back. You're listening to episode 127 of my Main Birth. As a reminder, I share all different types of stories that are submitted to me Hospital births, birth center births, all different types of home births, positive experiences, negative experiences and everything in between. The only requirement for sharing a birth story on the podcast is that at least one of your birth stories is a main birth story. As an added bonus, all of my podcast guests receive a gift certificate for a family adventure photo session on the session day of your choice. I host session days for my podcast guests at iconic locations across Maine throughout the spring, summer and fall. So if you're interested in joining the community of Maine moms sharing birth stories on the podcast, fill out the form over on the podcast page on my website, mymainbirthcom, or you can always send me a message over on Instagram at mymainbirth.
Angela: 3:31
Today's birth story guest is Gloria, and she's here to share her two main home birth stories, both with loving care from Sokopee midwives. I had the incredible honor of being Gloria's birth photographer and doula for her second birth, which was only a few weeks ago. We recorded this episode when she was just 12 days postpartum with her second baby and I'm so excited to share it with you All. Right, hi, gloria, welcome to my Main Birth. Good afternoon, happy to be here. So, to get started, will you share a little bit about you and your family?
Gloria: 4:07
So it's me and my husband, luke, and our two children, azariah, who is going to be two this month, and our newest addition, luke Ellis, who will be two weeks on in two days. So he's only 12 days old. Yeah, and that's all four of us. We live in Naples, maine, and we have a dog as well Jonah. He's currently still at doggy daycare, but, yeah, that's us.
Angela: 4:35
Amazing. Now, jumping into your birth stories, will you share about how you found out you were pregnant for the first time and like what your thoughts were in choosing your care?
Gloria: 4:47
Yep. So we got pregnant in 2021. And, unfortunately, we did miscarry. At 13 weeks I didn't have any signs of like I was bloated, but I didn't have any morning sickness. We did the blood test and we found out we were having a boy. So we were really excited about that. But unfortunately, you know, one day I just woke up and there was blood and then it got worse and we went to the ER and they weren't super. They didn't really know what to do. They were just like, yeah, you're miscarrying, and sent me on my way, but that was in 2021, so that was difficult. But in November of 2022, we found out we were pregnant again and we were really, really happy but, of course, like a little bit reserved because of the previous loss. But I got sick right away. So I kind of had a feeling that it was, you know, a stronger pregnancy. So I kind of had a feeling that it was, you know, a stronger pregnancy.
Gloria: 5:45
And we have a good friend of ours that was over our home during this time and I just growing up, I think, with how I felt, with care and the medical system and stuff like that. I wanted to do something, whether it was like a birth center or like a home birth, just something that I could have control over myself, but also like my baby and stuff like that. And I always felt when I went into hospitals or doctor's offices it was like you're on their turf now. So I kind of and I know like birth is something super intimate and really important. How you give birth matters, so I wanted something that I could have control over. So this friend of ours I had kind of floated the idea of a home birth but not being from Maine, I wasn't really sure where to start. And this friend of ours who was over our house was like, oh, my goodness, me and my wife did a home birth for both of our daughters and we went with Sakopee midwives and Brenda Sarabian. She delivered both our children and it was like the best experience and I never hear like men talking like that excited about birth and stuff. And so I was just like instantly hooked. I was asking him all these questions and he was like I believe she still practices Like you should go with them. And so my husband, who was like we're not doing a home birth, was more like oh, like people do this because a friend that you know we're good friends of ours and he respects was saying it was just amazing. So he's like, well, maybe we can meet them and like see how it goes.
Gloria: 7:19
So I called Sakopi midwives. They had availability. We went in for a consult and I met with Brenda and Acadia and we instantly just fell in love. It was before their office space, so it was at Brenda's home and it's this beautiful farmhouse overlooking the Saco River and she has little baby goats in the window. It's so homey and she had muffins ready for us. It was so sweet and totally not what my husband was used to with prenatal care or myself. So we just instantly fell in love and we were like, yep, we're, we're going with them. So that's, that's how we decided to go that route.
Angela: 7:54
I love that. So how was your pregnancy looking Like? How were you feeling throughout that pregnancy?
Gloria: 8:01
So once we had the initial ultrasound and everything looked good and my morning sickness was morning sickness was strong, was strong, I started getting really excited and we both were. We ended up I did another blood test to find out the gender and I blindfolded myself and I had a bunch of blue ducks and pink ducks and I FaceTimed a friend of mine and I showed her the paper so she knew the gender and I told her, whichever color was the right color, put it in this box, like tell me and the camera, and I'll put it in a box, because we were going on a cruise at 16 weeks and I wanted to find out on the cruise. So I like held up each duck. She told me which ones to put in. And when we went on our cruise for my husband's birthday we had like a nice dinner and I opened up the gift and it was pink ducks. So we were like, oh my goodness. And so for people who know, with cruises, little rubber duckies, you find them over on cruise ships, it's like a cruise thing. So it was like fun that we opened up and there was little pink ducks and we were like, oh my goodness, we're having a girl. I was kind of like wanted a boy because to kind of to replace the miscares that I had had. But I was still really excited, and my husband too. He was super excited as well.
Gloria: 9:14
And yeah, the pregnancy took forever. I felt like, even though I was working remotely full time, I just I'm a planner. So I had the room all ready, I had everything for the home birth all set and ready and I felt like I overplanned, which was great because I didn't feel like I was taken off guard with anything. But the prenatal appointments were amazing and they were really helpful. We had quite a bit of appointments with them, just the standard ones. We did blood tests to make sure my levels were good. We had three ultrasounds in the beginning and then we had a few more later on when I went over 42 weeks. But it was a typical like my morning sickness cleared up at around 14 weeks and it was really good it was. I enjoyed it. It was great.
Angela: 10:06
That's awesome. So what were the final weeks and then days leading up to when your labor started looking like?
Gloria: 10:15
So I had at 41 weeks. We have neighbors that are awesome, fun, loving, and they were like, oh, we should go tubing. And I'm like, oh, yeah, let's go tubing, it'll help, like, stir labor up, which was a bad idea because it was a little more rough than I thought it would be. And so at 41 weeks, I was like sitting in my bed I'm like I think we need to go get an ultrasound because that tubing experience was a little rough and I'm afraid that I did something wrong. So. So we went for an ultrasound at 41 weeks and everything was fine. But main med was like you need to stay and get induced. You're 41 weeks, like let's get this baby out. And I'm like, no, I'm not doing that, I have a home birth, everything's all ready. And then at 42 weeks, it was the day before I was 40 or two days before I was 42 weeks and we had an ultrasound scheduled, just because my husband was a little nervous about the whole home birth. So he was like any week after 40, let's get an ultrasound and make sure everything's good. So on that Wednesday before the ultrasound, the day before, I was experiencing early labor. So I had my mother-in-law come down. We were planning to have my mother-in-law there at the birth and a doula there as well. So they had come on that Wednesday and had like early labor. I didn't really know what birth was about or labor, so I just kind of like went with it.
Gloria: 11:37
And then that Thursday morning at 9 am it was time for my ultrasound andI was still like feeling feelings, but it wasn't like labor, labor, it was just early labor. So we drove an hour to Maine Med and we had our appointment there and they were like oh, your amniotic fluid is at a three, so you have low fluid. We're going to transfer you to L&D and get you induced to have this baby. And I'm like wait. I was like shocked because I felt great, I was just expecting everything to be good. And so I'm like wait, wait, can I talk to the doctor? And they're like no, well, they went out and talked to the doctor and the doctor was like no, like just go get induced. Like you have low fluid. You know you can't do a home birth. So I was very upset and I called my midwives and they were like well, let's see if I can talk to the doctor. And they couldn't get ahold of the doctor.
Gloria: 12:30
So this was at nine o'clock in the morning and we're sitting in the parking garage there and I'm like I really want to do a home birth and I feel like everything's fine and I feel like I'm in early labor. And so the midwives asked the ultrasound tech like oh, she's in early labor, does it matter? And they're like nope, like you need to go get induced. So I talked to the midwives and well, first of all my husband was like staying, get induced, like we want to make sure this baby is like safe. And my mother-in-law was like staying, get induced.
Gloria: 12:57
And I was the only one and my midwives, like I was the only one that was just like fighting, like I really want to do a home birth, I feel like I should just go home and like I'll go into labor. So I talked to Grace and her and Acadia were on call and she's like if you're not in active labor by one o'clock cause they were planning to come and do a visit and check my vitals and everything at one o'clock they're like if you're not in active labor by one o'clock, we'll recommend you go in and get induced, but go home, relax, have lunch. I was very upset on the phone with them. So calm down, it's fine. Go home and we'll talk at one o'clock and I was like okay.
Angela: 13:34
So how is your mindset leading up to this point with going over your due date?
Gloria: 13:37
I was to be honest, I was fine. I didn't feel like we live on the water. So I was on my pizza floats doing emails and I was enjoying it. It was quiet. I was just staying close to home. I wasn't like we need to get this baby out. I didn't feel that way at all. I had mentally prepared to go to 42 weeks because I'm a first time mom, so I wasn't worried about it or scared. I really was mentally good. It was just when they told me that, like I had low fluid, I was like oh, I have to have this baby like, or else I'm going to have it like and have to go to the hospital. I have to get this baby out. But up until that point I was fine.
Angela: 14:17
Yeah, oh my gosh, so that's still a lot of pressure. Like says you're leaving the hospital, you're like, okay, I have to like go into labor right now, or like this afternoon by one o'clock Back to the hospital, by one o'clock Exactly. So, yeah, how was the rest of that day for you?
Gloria: 14:30
So I was very upset when I got home and I'm like so my neighbor had taken my dog. My dog is very needy, like needs his walks and stuff. So my neighbor had gotten them, taken him down the road when I went into labor. So I told my husband I'm going to go for a walk it's a mile to the end of the road, a mile back, and I'm going to go pick up my dog, take him for a walk and come home and then I'll rest. And because I just didn't want to talk to anyone, I was just like trying to mentally prepare if I had to go into the hospital, like what that was going to look like, because I didn't know anyone there and I had already formed such great relationships with Sakopi midwives. So I went to my neighbor, picked up the dog and my neighbor was like what are you doing? And I'm like I just need to go for a walk. And he's like if you need to get induced, it's fine, like just relax, don't try to control everything. And I'm like I know. But I was really upset and it was raining. So I walked two miles down the road, brought my dog back and by the time I got home it was like around noon. I was like feeling labor pains and I'm like, oh, this is a good sign. So I was really excited at that point. So then Grace came by at one o'clock and she said you are at a four, you're at active labor. And I was like, okay, this is great, this is awesome. So at that point I was relieved and my doula had come. She was getting everything set up. We have like a table that has all of the midwife stuff on it. So they were getting that set up. My husband was getting the birthing pool kind of prepped and the midwives came and hung downstairs and I just labored in my room and in the living room for a long time, a long time.
Gloria: 16:05
I think it started getting pretty painful around six o'clock in that that evening and I remember texting my friend who were the same age and she just had her second child about like okay, how bad does it get? Like I can handle it right now, like how bad does it get? And she like explained it really well. She was like it's like a leveling up process, like as soon as you tolerate it, it gets worse. And then your body tolerates it, then it gets worse, then it gets to a point where you can't take it anymore. And then the baby comes and I was like okay. So I felt my body like leveling up every time, like it was crazy. It was crazy.
Gloria: 16:45
So I labored in the tub a bunch. We got that set up. I labored in the tub for like five hours and then I remember looking at Acadia and being like I can't do this anymore. This is really painful. So they checked my dilation. I was at a 10 and they're like you know, when you feel the need to push, like push. So I was in the tub because I was like I'll push to the tub. And so Acadia was like you're going to have to push harder than you ever pushed in your entire life to get this baby out when you're ready. And I was like, okay.
Gloria: 17:12
So I remember pushing and almost passing out and I was looking at her. I'm like I think I almost passed out. What happens if I pass out and I have this baby? And she's like why don't we get out of the tub and try the birth stool? And I'm like, okay, that sounds like a plan.
Gloria: 17:26
So we got on the birth stool and as soon as I got in that position of the birth stool, my husband behind me, and I felt the feeling of the need to push. I was like okay, like this is way better than labor. So I like pushed as hard as I could and I felt like wow, like the baby coming down. And then it was maybe like three or four pushes, I think it was 22 minutes of pushing and I remember telling Grace like if you see the head, tell me and I'll just push this baby out. And she's like okay.
Gloria: 17:58
And then I gave a push and the baby like fell out and I have a video. And when I watched the video, grace like barely caught her. She like flew out and I was like, oh my goodness, and I have a video. And when I watched the video, grace barely caught her. She flew out and I was like, oh my goodness. And so they put the baby on my chest and I kept trying to calm down the baby. I was like, oh, shh, don't cry. But they're trying to get her to cry because her breathing was a little shallow, she had swallowed some fluid and there was meconium in the water. So they were trying to get that out of her and like suck it out of her. So they were trying to get her to cry. So she finally got that good, and she got that good cry out and the stuff out of her lungs and she was good.
Gloria: 18:33
And then Acadia looks at me and she goes. Another one of our clients are also just had a baby right now. So I have to go over there, so I need to leave. But Heidi, I look up and there's this person I've never met before. Heidi's going to help clean up everything and we're going to touch base tomorrow, okay, and I was like all right. So she like left.
Gloria: 18:50
Acadia, and I look up and Heidi, that's her name. She's from a different practice, she's a backup midwife and this was at like one o'clock in the morning. She's like it's Pitocin, because I guess I was bleeding a lot and my placenta hadn't come out yet. And she's like we're going to give you Pitocin and I'm like I don't want it. I'm like, no, I don't like needles. And I'm like, well, can I do anything else? And Grace was like, well, you can try coughing.
Gloria: 19:21
The placenta finally came out at like one o'clock and they put that in a bowl and I they transferred me to my bed and I was able to hold her with the, with the placenta still attached and I fell like instantly asleep. I was so exhausted and tired because I was in active labor for probably so from like one o'clock to 1230 that night, and so I was. I fell right asleep and while I was sleeping they cut the cord and they like weighed the baby and did everything. I was sleeping and then I woke up and I was able to nurse and she latched kind of. She was. It was very shallow.
Gloria: 20:00
I nursed her through the night and it like really ruined my nipples, but I was able to do a lot of skin to skin and she was able to get milk right away and Luke was able to cut the cord. I said that and they did all the way. She was perfectly healthy, no issues Besides me bleeding a little bit. I didn't have any other issues either. They did go. I was sleeping, but they did like show Luke the placenta and everything and the placenta looked good. The midwives cleaned up everything and then they left and they did a few vital checks while they were there, but then they left and came back in 24 hours and, yeah, that was her birth.
Angela: 20:38
So how was your like initial postpartum?
Gloria: 20:42
It was great. I, I was. It's funny because you kind of trade off the hospital experience like being able to do like I don't say pain-free, but having medical help to help ease some of that pain. You kind of trade it off for like being monitored by them and maybe not getting the best rest right afterwards and like kind of being monitored a lot whereas you go through a ton of pain with the home birth but afterwards it's like you're in your bed, you don't have to get up. My mother-in-law was there cleaning the house, did all the laundry, my husband was there getting me water, getting me food. I didn't have to move at all.
Gloria: 21:16
Nursing was difficult at first with a shallow latch, but I had a pediatrician who was a lactation consultant and she worked through that with me, so that was good. I had to pump for a few days afterwards because my nipples were so beat up, but I I pumped and I bottle fed her and Luke was able to feed her and then we slowly worked back into getting a good latch. I started I. It was funny.
Gloria: 21:41
At my baby shower, a woman, a friend of mine, she gave me this book about raising a newborn and managing feeding schedules and sleep schedules and stuff like that, and I never read books. I really don't. I listen to books, but I don't really read books. By day three with the newborn, I didn't really know what I was doing. I thought it was going to come naturally and I was like where's that book? So I read the book and it helped me, like put her on a schedule and so she started feeding way better and sleeping way better and that sort of thing. But it was great. Like initial postpartum was amazing. I didn't have to do anything. I felt like I could just stay at home and bond with my baby and my husband and all that. So it was great.
Angela: 22:20
Awesome. How about like your postpartum care with your midwives and like the experience of just having them postpartum there to support you? It was great.
Gloria: 22:28
They came at 24 hours and just like, talked me through everything and did all the weighing and stuff like that and taking my vitals, and then they came at 72 hours and then a week they came, but also they were available like 24 seven via text. So if I had any little question or concern they're right there and they have a two week checkup where they have at the office or Brenda's house and I remember I made it there on time and she's like we usually block up an extra half hour because usually moms run late for this one, but you're on time. So things must be going pretty well and I was like, yeah, so I made that one on time and they're just, they're amazing, they, they're, they really do care, they really love babies and they really care for the mother too. So I couldn't say enough about how, how they were postpartum for me.
Angela: 23:20
Yeah, it's so special to have that support that goes a little bit beyond the just like six-week checkup, as if you were like in the hospital care. It's like you don't really see anyone for six weeks. It's like wait, no, like you need more.
Gloria: 23:32
It's above and beyond, because you form this relationship with the same three women Brenda, katie and Grace and you see them monthly and then biweekly and then weekly, and they become like people that you really do trust. You trust them. So when they do tell you something like hey, if you're not in active labor by one o'clock, I'm going to recommend you go in and get induced, you're not mad at them, you're not angry, you're just like. You know how I feel about all this and you're still making this recommendation. Okay, I'm going to trust you. When this doctor that I'd never even seen or met was like you need to stay and get deuced, I was like that's the last thing I'm doing right now. I don't care, you know. So they're able to really earn your trust and and and direct you in the right and responsible things to do, you know.
Angela: 24:16
Yeah, so so important, yeah. So how did you find out you were pregnant for the second time now?
Gloria: 24:25
So we I definitely wanted more kids after Azariah. She was such a good girl and we wanted to have a little boy too. And so we didn't really. We weren't really preventing anything, we were just we weren't really trying either. It was like if it's going to happen, it's going to happen. And once she started sleeping through the night I you know start. I started ov night, I started getting my period again. So I was like, oh well, if it happens, it happens.
Gloria: 24:51
So we got pregnant in February of 2024. And unfortunately, we got a positive test. And then a few weeks went by and I ended up miscarrying. And then that happened again in April of 2024. So I was kind of like, okay, this is weird, I'm also RH negative as well. So I didn't know if that had something to do with it. I didn't receive any Rogam during my first pregnancy, so I didn't know if I had something to do with it or not. But I did end up getting another positive test in October of 2024. And I was like, okay, let's see if this sticks, you know. And sure enough, I got the morning sickness, like right away. And I was like, okay, and I we held off on the initial ultrasound because, again, I was just like you know, we didn't.
Gloria: 25:41
If it was, if it was good, it was going to be good. If not, if not. So I just held off till, I think, 16 weeks and we didn't want to know what the gender was. We wanted to be surprised, because my husband really wanted a boy and I could care less, but I wanted, I wanted that to be an extra special, like something that we were looking forward to, especially because I'm such a planner. I was like this is something that is like a little surprise for me and for him and so well. So I resigned from my previous position. Like I worked up until the day I had her and then I sent a message saying hi, baby, I'm no longer coming back. So I wasn't working up until this time as well. So I was able to stay home with Azariah and time seemed to go pretty fast.
Gloria: 26:28
But we knew initially when we got pregnant that we were going to go with Salgopi midwives again because they're local to us and that sort of thing. But that's how we found out. We had a 16-week ultrasound and we had a 24-week ultrasound and then we had a 37-week ultrasound and then we had a 37-week ultrasound. So those are the only ones we had with this baby here that we just had. The pregnancy was good. I was extremely tired, and I think it's just because you have a toddler running around and with Azariah I could just nap whenever I wanted to. But this time around it was like you nap when she naps and that's that, and then you're like go, go, go. She's very, she has a lot of energy.
Gloria: 27:12
So during this pregnancy, one thing we wanted to do different from last time is we want to do a birth photographer, which that's where you come in. So we had I don't know if you remember how we connected, but I was looking for stuff on the main Facebook, the moms of main Facebook I was looking for a recommendation in case we had a boy, and so you had connected me with someone that could help with that. So that's how we connected. And when you had said that, oh, like I'm a birth photographer and a doula and our previous doula she was expecting her fourth child, so and her kids were all very young, so she was kind of not at a place in her life where she could be taken away for a few days if the need arose. So I talked to my husband and I was like, oh, like we really wanted a birth photographer and I looked at all of your Instagram and your website and stuff and I was like, oh, like she looks really good and I think we should go with her. So we did the initial consult with you and we decided to go ahead with you.
Gloria: 28:11
And, yeah, during the pregnancy I think cause it was my second I didn't need as much support during my pregnancy just because a lot of the stuff was routine and it was going so fast. But I know, like for anyone out there that it's their first baby and maybe they're not being seen by midwives, maybe they don't feel like they're getting as much support like personally, definitely like the services that you provide during the pregnancy would be really helpful. Like you go into a lot of detail about each stages of pregnancy and like what to expect and you know, depending on how you deliver, where you deliver and all that like a lot of really good information and stuff like that. I didn't feel like I needed it as much with my second one just because it was so busy, but you definitely earned your keep towards the end, for sure during the birth. But, yeah, the pregnancy was good. I didn't have any morning sickness after like 14 weeks again, but I was tired and yeah, that was the second pregnancy.
Angela: 29:16
Yeah. So what were the final weeks and then days leading up to when your labor started looking like for you?
Gloria: 29:22
So the second pregnancy I was like ready. I was like I cannot go to 42 weeks this time. I hope I don't go to 42 weeks Like, oh man, I was ready. I felt like I was ready at 36 weeks this time around. But again, time was flying.
Gloria: 29:36
I had every week something going on, and the summers there's always something. I had definitely dove into the mom community around here with the story time, play groups and nature play groups. So there was always something I could do every day of the week if I wanted to, or just stay home and chill by the water if I wanted to. So I kept really busy, which took my mind off of it. But I definitely was like, as soon as I hit 40 weeks, I'm going to do all the things to try to induce labor.
Gloria: 30:08
Yeah, so on my due date I had an appointment and they tried to do a membrane sweep, but they were like no, the baby's, your cervix is way far back and the baby's head's right there, so we're not going to do that. And I was like okay. And so they gave me the tincture and they were like you can take this tincture and basically you take it. You take like a dropper or dropper and a half no, a dropper full every half hour for five doses and you pump in between. It's supposed to help with like uterine cramping if your body's ready to go into labor. If you're not, it doesn't really do anything. But if you're on that verge, that cusp, it does like help. It's supposed to. I did take a tincture with Azariah and I went into labor the next day, so I thought it was like magic potion. But I did that on a Monday. Nothing happened and I was like all right, I'll do it on Friday if I don't go into labor again.
Angela: 31:00
So the Monday that you first took it, that was at 40 weeks.
Gloria: 31:12
Yes, yep, I took it at 40 weeks and then I took it at 41 weeks. I did that again and then when I went so I was due on the 24th and the baby was born on the 2nd, okay, so the 28th of July, that Monday I had taken the tincture again, and then on the 30th, which is a Wednesday, I had went to bed as normal and I woke up wet and I felt my water break. So my water did not break with Azariah until she came out, and I guess only 10% of women's water break anyways before labor.
Gloria: 31:44
So I was like, oh, this is interesting so initially I was super excited and I reached out to you. I was like because I read, I'm like, oh, in 24 hours. Most women give birth in 24 hours. I'm like this is exciting. So I reached out to you and I was like, hey, just let you know If you can come, that would be great. This baby should be here soon. My water broke, this is great. And you were like yep, as soon as I'm ready, I'll be on my way. And so that was great and I called my midwife. My midwife was like all right, well, just relax, try to get some rest if you're not feeling any contractions which I wasn't feeling any contractions I let my husband sleep because I knew he would really be needed during that day. So I just I didn't tell him. I sent him a text so that when he woke up he would see it. But I I let my midwife, my doula, know that that had happened. And so I woke up the next morning and my husband was like super excited.
Gloria: 32:36
He was like we're having a baby today, Like I got your text, this is great. So he called his mother-in-law my, his mom mother-in-law came that same day and so, like everyone was here and I'm like, okay, like this is great. But I wasn't really feeling anything, but I was still really excited because I knew it had to be within 24 hours. That's what Google says.
Angela: 32:55
It's like you're going on vacation. It's so hard to resist that excitement, like for real.
Gloria: 33:00
So I took the tincture because I was like, just in case, I'm going to take this tincture and I'm going to pump and everything. So I did that and I was like I'm going to walk because that's what happened last time. So I walked five miles and I started feeling like contractions, but they weren't painful. So I knew like I was in early labor.
Angela: 33:19
Hold on, let's pause right there. Like you just said that so casually, like, and I walked five miles, okay, so like your water broke and you literally did walk five miles that day, walking down your street, walking back, walking down, like it was you know you weren't just like sitting around waiting for labor to start.
Gloria: 33:36
No, I wasn't. Yeah, there was. Well, you have to. So it's funny in my home it was like you were there and you were taking photos and also helping with my daughter, who absolutely loved you and still says your name when we point to two pictures. So, and then my mother-in-law was there helping with my daughter and my husband was like helping me getting to get into labor and me I was like okay, like let's have a baby, I'm going to do all the things. So it was definitely go time for me in my head. So that's kind of what I was doing, because my thought was, well, I'm just going to go until I really feel contractions and then that will mean active labor, and then I'll just go into my room and I'll progress like last time.
Gloria: 34:16
So Danielle was there, one of the midwives. She was a new addition to the practice since the last time I had been with them. So she was there and I was like I'm feeling contractions. You know, I walked, I did the tincture. Can you like check my dilation? So for anyone who doesn't know, when your water breaks, the licensure with midwives are, you know they have to give birth within 72 hours because the risk of infection goes up and so they'll have you transferred to a hospital if you don't give birth within 72 hours. With cervical checks they really want to limit doing them because of infection. So I asked Danielle to please check my cervix please, because I just want to know mentally where I'm at. So she checked me and she's like oh, you're at a four. So I was super excited. I'm like, oh, maybe I'm just tolerating labor like way better at this time, like this is great. So went for another walk. This is how I got five miles in that day. Like I went for another long walk and I was like this is great, but it wasn't getting any worse. So it was like every 10 to 15 minutes I was getting a contraction and it was like, obviously it was a contraction, but it wasn't bad.
Gloria: 35:22
So night fell and Danielle's time on call was coming to an end, grace time was coming in. So Grace came at eight o'clock that night and I was like can you please check me again? And she's like ah, you seem like you're kind of fine and I'm like, I know, but it's been like eight hours since Danielle did and like I was at a four. So I've got to be more like I was trying to mentally like make myself go into labor. I feel like, or trick myself. I really was thinking I'm like maybe I'm at a six and I'm just tolerating it. So well, I'm like that much of a brave person.
Gloria: 35:56
So Grace checks me after I begged her to and she's like, um, so you're at a two. And so Danielle was there and she's like that's not her cervix, like her cervix is way far back. And I'm like, oh shoot, when she said that, I'm like great, she was like it's okay, what you, what you were feeling, wasn't her cervix or whatever. So I was like at that point I felt like not defeated, but like, okay, I'm done walking and doing the pumping and everything. I'm just going to go to bed cause I'm tired. So, and I had been eating and drinking throughout the day and resting and stuff too, but like I was just done at that point. So I was like, okay, we're not doing any more cervical checks until I'm ready to push this baby out, because we've already done two and I know we only have like three that you're going to do before. You're like no. So I was like she's like listen, it's only been 12 hours, you need to just relax, get some rest. We'll reconvene tomorrow, don't worry about it. I was like, okay, I had a great night's rest.
Gloria: 36:55
Starting first thing on Friday morning I took the tincture again, I pumped and I walked a bunch, I did the mile circuit, I did all the things I ate, I rested, I napped, I. I did the mile circuit and I did all the things I ate, I rested, I napped and I just did the things. And mentally I was definitely at a place where I was like I really hope I go into labor, like I can't have to fight for my home birth again, like everything's all paid for, everything's all situated, like everyone's here I, this needs to happen. So I was definitely getting into my head a bit. Nighttime fell again and Grace shows up and I'm like you don't need to check me, I'm the same as yesterday. She's like I can tell. So she was just like all right, so if you don't go into labor in another, because right now we were almost at 48 hours, like that night would have been 48. So she's like I would suggest we make a plan because you don't want to go be transferred right at 72 hours, because that's like at 11 o'clock at night and I'm like I know I have a toddler like we're going to be reasonable. So we were like we decided, if I wasn't in active labor by 2 pm the next day, that I would transfer to Maine Med to get induced.
Gloria: 38:05
And so it was really hard because I had to mentally prepare for that as well. But again, I love my home birth, I love my planning, but I'm not reckless. I'm going to do what's right and I trust my midwives and if that's what they say is the best thing to do, I'm going to do that. So after Grace left, you had come in and you had talked to me about getting into the right headspace. So after Grace left, you had come in and you had talked to me about getting into the right headspace. And it's so funny because my mind's always going and it's hard to like stop thinking about certain things.
Angela: 38:32
I feel like it was so hard because it was just going going and you're just like no, and I'm just like waiting for that time when you're ready to listen, almost Because, like you know you can't, you know it's, you're doing, you, you know like it's, so you can't control birth. Yeah, exactly, and so easy to get in your head and just like to just get to that point where you're like, okay, like regroup, almost right.
Gloria: 38:55
Right. So I kind of accepted. I accepted like, okay, if I have to go to Maine Med, I'll go to Maine Med, which is a big thing to accept. If I don't go into labor, I don't go into labor. What I'm going to do if I have to go to Maine Med is I'm going to get a good night's sleep because I'm going to have to hardcore advocate for myself when I go there. So I'm going to get a good night's rest. I'm going to have a nice big breakfast. Oh, one other thing I told Grace. I said, well, I'm taking castor oil in the morning and she's like we can't recommend that. I'm like I know, but I'm taking it, and she's like okay. So my plan was to have a nice big breakfast and then take castor oil, and I'm like that'll do it, That'll have to do it. I didn't want to do that, but I was like I will do that before going into Maine Med first thing in the morning.
Gloria: 39:45
So I went to sleep that night. So I had my talk with Angela, you and I was like, okay, try to relax. It's so funny telling someone to relax because it's like that's the last thing they want to do. But try to relax, have a game plan. I went to bed and then I woke up with really strong contractions at 1130 that night. So I was like, oh my goodness, this is it, this is great. And I knew you know, know the feeling it's like it takes you right back. You're like okay, this is active labor. So I let my husband sleep again because I knew he would need his rest and I just started just like laboring in my in my bed. I didn't fall back to sleep, I couldn't sleep.
Gloria: 40:28
And then first thing in the morning a new midwife was on call again, Brenda, and she's an elder midwife and she doesn't really practice that much anymore. She doesn't do the late nights anymore. This was early in the morning, so she was on call and she came in and I was like I have been laboring from 1130 to seven o'clock in the morning and so I was really feeling like I was feeling them and so I was like can you please check me? And she's like look, look at, like they don't really want to check you but me. It's like I need to know for mental, like mentally, I'm like, even if it's a four, I'll be okay if it's a four. So she checked me and I was like this will be the last time, I promise. So she checked me and I was at a five and I'm like, yes, I was so happy. I was like now it's go time.
Gloria: 41:10
So I turned my music on, I like shut myself in my room, I used the birth sling, I used the ball and I just like labored in there for all it was. It literally was only like a couple hours. And then they started setting up the pool and I was like wait, it's not pool time yet. Like I'm doing, I'm managing these pretty well. They're painful but I'm managing them well enough. Like I don't want to get in the pool too early because I know how bad it can get, you know. So they set up, you guys all set up the pool and I labored in the pool for another couple hours and then so it was very weird.
Gloria: 41:45
My labor was weird this time because the contractions were painful, but I was having like eight to 10 minutes between each contraction, which is really rare if you're like close to giving birth. Like it's usually like really bad, like it's it's close together. So I knew something didn't feel like a hundred percent normal from last time or the same as Azariah that's my older daughter's name. And so I, I was like I, between contractions I was able to drink and eat, which was really good because I needed that energy. But I was laboring and after a while I was like can you please check me again? Grace is like nope, regardless of what you are, you're going to have this baby. You're fine. I'm like okay.
Gloria: 42:28
So I was laboring and laboring, and laboring, and at like 10 o'clock it was like okay, let's pull out the birth stool. And again this is a little foggy for me because I was in a lot of pain and it was a crazy time. But they pulled out the birth stool. They were coming in and setting up stuff and I was like okay, is it time to push? Because you can kind of read the room, like the midwives kind of know, and I'm like like I don't feel, like I'm ready to push. And with Ezra I knew I was ready to push. So when I saw them setting up and getting the birth stool ready, so I'm like is it time to push? And they're like if you feel like you want to push, push. If not, don't worry about it. And I'm like but like I think you guys want me to push because you're setting everything up and like I see people in but I'm not feeling it.
Gloria: 43:13
So, anyways, I sat on the birth stool and I tried to push for like an hour and it was like a normal person not put put, not pregnant, like if you were to sit down and someone was like push. You could like try to push, but that's the feeling. It's like, okay, what am I pushing out? I don't like, what am I doing here? So that's how I was feeling and I was getting really nervous because I was in so much pain. But I had a breaks in between the intense pain. So it was very odd. So I was like well, Brenda was like, why don't you just try to lay down and labor for a little bit?
Angela: 43:44
Yeah, we were like let's give you some space, you know, at that point. So you had a little bit of alone time there, like after that first. Like time on the birth stool Right at first, like time on the birthstool Right.
Gloria: 43:53
Right. So I labored in my bed for I don't know how long, but I did like three contractions on one side, three contractions on the other side. Then I would stand up and do three contractions and when I was standing up the contractions weren't were more bearable, but when I was laying down on both my sides they were like excruciatingly painful. It was so painful, it was so bad, it was so painful.
Angela: 44:15
But anyways, I was like I was definitely the end because you were only it was only like 20 minutes before like you had your door like kind of open, but you're mostly like in there alone and we were all kind of outside and everybody was just like totally relaxed and like eating lunch. Your husband had just made a full plate of food and he started eating it. And then you open the door. I was like it's time.
Gloria: 44:36
It's time. Well, I had I. I opened the door and I'm like, oh, you just sat down to eat.
Angela: 44:38
All right.
Gloria: 44:39
Nevermind. And they're like no, what? Like you're the center of the show here, like this can wait. I'm like I was like well, I think I'm just well, my mental thing it's not like I felt like I needed to push no-transcript Like I just was like pushing out nothing, but like giving deep, like as hard as I could push, and I felt like I was I don't know how long, but it felt like I was doing that forever and I just kept doing it and breaking and doing and it was just like so painful. And then I did one really really hard push and I felt the baby's head go around my pubic bone and I didn't think I was doing anything. I thought I was just like pushing it in the air. But when that happened I was like, oh my goodness, that's it, that's what I needed to to and I did one push and then the baby came out. After that I was like one push and then the baby came out and it was funny because we have that you videotaped it and when I watched the video, like the midwives were doing hand signals to each other about like how I was progressing and stuff that I was like this is so crazy. They have their own sign language going on. But the baby came out and my husband was like it's a boy and they put him on my chest and he was like screaming and crying immediately and upon the newborn exam, they saw that his head was turned to the side and he was stuck on my pubic bone. So that's why my water probably broke. That's probably why I wasn't progressing unless I was laying down and switching sides or whatever. And that's why I wasn't feeling. The pushing feeling is because the head was like stuck and if I it's funny because if I was at Maine Med I would have been like wheel me in for a C-section. I'm done Like that's how. It was so much more painful than Azariah's ever was.
Gloria: 46:27
So when the baby finally came out, it was like oh, my goodness, such a relief. I was shocked. I was like I can't believe I pushed this baby out because I didn't think I could do it and I was in shock and I was like really cold and I wanted to lay down because I was pushing up against my husband but my back was killing me and everything. So the cord was short. So when I was being transferred and I was laying on my bed from the birth stool. Brenda was like well, the cord's white. If you want to cut the cord, we can do that. And I was being transferred and I was laying I was laying on my bed from birth stool. Brenda was like, well, the cord's white. If you want to cut the cord, we can do that. And I was like, okay, cut the cord. And they're like well, you wanted to cut the cord.
Gloria: 47:02
So in the prenatal visits I was like I want to cut the cord this time, because last time I was sleeping and my husband did it. So they quickly clamped it and I got to cut the cord, which was great, and they put the baby on my chest and I was laying on my back. But I was just so weak I was like can someone take the baby? So my husband took the baby and then the baby pooped all over my husband, which was hilarious because he doesn't like stuff like that. So he handed them. I think did he hand the baby to you, or was it Danielle? I think it was Danielle, yeah, so he handed the baby to Danielle.
Gloria: 47:35
The midwife cleaned off her baby, like wiped him down, the baby down, and my husband went and rinsed off and then he came back and took the baby back. But within like a few minutes the placenta came out when I was laying on the bed and Grace was like congratulations, you're no longer pregnant. I was like there we go. But I was really really cold and shivering and telling everyone how much pain I was in because it was the worst pain in my entire life and my husband who just wanted two kids. I was like I'll never have any more children, that's it, it's done. This is the only two.
Gloria: 48:06
And so they did the newborn exam. Everything was great. He was 9 pounds 2 ounces, which Azariah was 7 pounds 14 ounces, so he was 9 pounds 14 ounces, so he was nine pounds two ounces. And he just got weighed two days ago and he's already 10 pounds in 11 days. Like that's ridiculous, that's crazy, I can't. But so the midwives cleaned up everything. Then they went and they gave us some. They checked my vitals, checked the baby out, got myself warm Cause I was like shivering and freezing. And then I got to hold the baby and got, got myself warm because I was like shivering and freezing. And then I got to hold the baby and got to snuggle him and he latched right away.
Gloria: 48:40
Really well, it was very surprising for me, my mother-in-law. So it was really sweet because my mother-in-law was there at the birth for Azariah and she wanted to be at the birth but also knew that Ezzie was her top priority. So she was with Ezzi, my daughter, for three days and my daughter is high energy and kept her going and running around and everything like that. But during this moment it was my daughter's nap time. So Ezi went down at 1230 and the baby was born at 144, I believe. And, incidentally, for all who care, 64 hours, all who care 64 hours, so I only I I had till 74 hours and I gave birth at 62, 64. So it was great, it was just in the nick of time, but, um, so yeah, my mother-in-law was able to come into the room and be able to be at the birth of Luke Ellis, my son. So that was really special for her.
Gloria: 49:33
And, and despite all of the screaming and yelling on my end, my baby didn't wake. My daughter, azariah, did not wake up and, yeah, so that was the birth. Oh, so after I nursed her a little bit and got my body temperature right, I did end up taking a nice shower, getting cleaned up, and then you took some great photos of Azariah when she woke up from her nap meeting her brother and that was really sweet and she definitely confused she's not too, she'll be too soon, so she's still young, but she's been so sweet and loving and loves to hold him and kiss him and stuff, so it's been great in that regard. But yeah, that was, that was the birth.
Angela: 50:15
Oh, that's so fun. So how has your last, I guess just 11 days gone?
Gloria: 50:22
Well, so a couple of things that are were different is the contractions after birth were so painful still and super painful. And nursing the contractions was were so painful Like I couldn't. So, brenda me. I couldn't. So, brenda me. I don't take Advil, I don't take any pain relievers. I just lean into the pain because I'm like, oh, it's your body telling you how far you can go and it'll help you to rest. However, brenda, she just looked at me. She's like take Tylenol. It gets worse with every kid. Don't suffer through those contractions. If it's really bad, just take Tylenol. It gets worse with every kid. Don't suffer through those contractions. Like, if it's really bad, just take Tylenol. So I suffered through it for one day and by day two it was so bad I couldn't sleep. So they were so bad I couldn't even like it was shocking how painful they were. So I took Tylenol and, sure enough, like the pain went away. I was like this is amazing. I like the pain went away. I was like this is amazing. So then I was like um, so I was able to walk around a little bit and when I was walking around, I guess I just loosened up like tissue that was still in my what do they call it? My pelvic vault or uterine vaults is what Brenda called it and I. I passed this giant piece of tissue and after that my back and my tractions felt way better after that. So that was like three days past postpartum that that that was passed and so I started feeling better.
Gloria: 51:46
I nursing he still is nursing really good. He is sleeping so well. He's. I'm only up. I've been sleep training myself as well. So I go to bed at nine. Everyone goes to bed, the kids go to bed at seven. But I wake him up and I feed him and I force myself to go to bed at nine, turn my phone on, do not disturb, and he only wakes up at 1230 and 430. And then he's up for the day at seven. So I was up like five or six times with Azariah, this one here. He's already in his crib sleeping really good and he's sleeping right now really good and he's eating really good and his awake time he's really interactive with me and his dad and Azariah. So it's great. He's such a good boy.
Gloria: 52:33
I have a list of of people who are like if there's anything I can do, let me know. I've had them. Come over and play with Azariah because she still is like a bundle of energy. So I've had people over playing with her my mother-in-law and friends and so she's gotten extra attention, which she loves. So I've been able to just rest and, you know, lay down, take naps and really bond with the baby and stuff, and during his nap time I'm able to play with Azariah too.
Gloria: 52:57
So postpartum this time has been really really good. I felt really supported, really taken care of, and the midwives as well. The same thing. Well Grace, it was funny. After the baby was born she's like most people couldn't have pushed out that one. Like that was a toughie. With the way his head was. She said I knew you could do it, but I know it was hard and I was like I did not think I could do it. I'm surprised I didn't. But afterwards we just talked through it, talked through everything and I'm already like I'll have one more. It wasn't that bad. Even though I know it was really bad, I'm still like it wasn't that bad. He's such a good baby and it was all worth it and everything. So I think we'll probably have one more. But yeah, postpartum even the really painful birth I'm like it wasn't that bad. The postpartum is going so well. I'm like this is nice. I'm just being able to hang home and no one expects anything of me, and it's been really great.
Angela: 53:56
It's been a really sweet time. Yeah, that's interesting how fast it shifts from I'm never going to do that again to okay, like that wasn't so bad. Actually, that was awesome.
Gloria: 54:04
Right, right. And it's like you think back and it it's like I wish even the first pregnancy too. It's like if you, if I, would have known that I would have delivered him at 64 hours into labor, I could have had three days of just enjoying the time in my house and just laboring and early labor and like whatever.
Gloria: 54:22
But you kind of almost ruin it when you put all the pressure on yourself. Not ruin it, but it makes it harder. So it's like I wish I would have just relaxed a little bit more and so I'm just relaxing now. Having two kids it's a lot harder, but it's the hard. I was just telling a friend it's. It's a hard like not. I can't face the day. I don't want to get out of bed and deal with my life. It's not that type of hard. It's okay Time to step up your game. You're going to have to have a little. You're gonna have to wake up a little earlier. You're going to have to wake up a little earlier. You're going to have to have a little more energy. You're going to have to be a little bit more patient and loving. It's that type of hard. It's more work, but it's definitely worth it. With the two of them they're just such sweet little kids.
Angela: 55:06
Yeah, that's amazing. So now, as a final question, if you were to give advice to someone who's expecting, or even new parents, at this point in your journey, what is the biggest?
Gloria: 55:19
thing you'd want to share, I guess, if you're pregnant, definitely listen to the Mind Made Birth podcast. If you're in Maine, get in touch with Angela, she's great. But also like learn as much as you can. Like educate yourself. Don't be, don't be afraid to pick up a book from a good author and learn about all the things that's going on with your body in pregnancy and listen to all the birth stories. They're all different, but you may experience one of those.
Gloria: 55:46
So, knowing everything's good and whether you're delivering at home or at a hospital, like get to know what you're going in for and have someone around you, if you can't advocate for yourself, someone that knows what you want and you know, understand the risks of everything, but also the pros of everything.
Gloria: 56:05
And form good relationships with your doctors that you're seeing, or midwives or whatever. And I would say, if you're pregnant, just knowledge is power. Really. For me, anyways, it was Like learn as much as you can. And also, when you have little kids too, it's been great for me to just find communities of people that have kids your age, because people who are a few months ahead of you can give you advice and you can help people that are a few months behind you, you know, or years with their little ones. So it's always great to have people that will give you some good advice or just be in listening ear and you can vent your frustrations too as well. But also just patience too. You have to have patience when you're pregnant, especially those last few weeks, and patience during your labor if it's not, if it doesn't go as you think it's supposed to go, and then like patience with your toddler, if you have one, and yourself with nursing and all that stuff Just, and your spouse, patience with your spouse.
Angela: 57:01
So yeah, yeah, this is so important and finding that local community which a lot of times is at your local libraries, like definitely, if you're a new mom, like check out your local library and like find that community of new moms because, yeah, they're out there, you're not alone. So, and one more question so I think, as your sneak peek, like I delivered the most photos in like a sneak peek that I've ever done and I'm still finishing your final gallery right now but like, when you saw like that first initial photos from your birth, what were your thoughts? My initial thought was I wish you were at Azariah's birth because I would have loved to Like.
Gloria: 57:36
When you saw, like that first initial photos from your birth, what were your thoughts? My initial thought was I wish you were at Azariah's birth because I would have loved to have those photos from my first birthing experience. But also I'm so glad that you were there and the photos for anyone, for people that when they think of birth photographer, they think of someone like holding a camera recording it or like a few pictures on an iPhone, like no, they're really good, they're they. She captures the moment. You capture the moment and I was so happy with them.
Gloria: 58:04
I but also just like reliving the moment was crazy and I've gotten like so many people cause I posted a few ones that were social media appropriate, a few of them on on Facebook, and I've had so many people reach out being like I identified with those photos. It takes me back to when I had children. You know what I'm saying. People really resonated with them as well and they reached out to me and was like oh my goodness, because most people don't have a photographer, capture that and pictures are really worth a thousand words Like. Sometimes a photo can tell, tell you a lot about an experience. So I was super happy with them and I'm excited to get the rest of them.
Angela: 58:44
Yeah, oh my gosh, there's so many good ones. Yeah, I'm so excited to deliver them to you. And yeah, you had an absolutely beautiful birth and it's such an honor to be there and support you. Beautiful birth, and it's such an honor to be there and support you. And thank you so much for taking the time to chat with me today, so early postpartum, and to share your birth stories with me. It's been so nice hearing your stories. Yes, thank you so much.
Angela: 59:08
Before you go, I just want to remind you I have a ton of resources for pregnancy and birth If you're pregnant, whether you're a first-time mom or if this is your fifth baby. I want you to check out the show notes, because I have some free trainings and free downloads that you can sign up for, as well as the link to access my Labor of Love, a comprehensive, self-paced online childbirth education course. I created this course specifically for moms who don't want to be told what to do, regardless of where you're birthing or who you're birthing with, and I'd honestly love to teach you everything that I know so that you can prepare for an autonomous birth experience and prepare to step into your role as the leader of your birth journey. So click to the show notes, check out all of those links and if you ever have any questions, feel free to DM me at my main birth over on Instagram.